In a recent interview with the highly intellectual and not-at-all-clickbaity “Brutally Delicious” podcast, ex-MEGADETH bassist David Ellefson (aka Junior, aka the guy who used to stand near Dave Mustaine) felt the need to clarify his *totally humble* comment that he “literally [doesn’t] ever have to work another day in [his] life.” The man is 60, lives in Scottsdale (a suburb, let’s be real), and apparently runs a bajillion businesses, from a record label (that definitely rivals major labels, right?) to a line of coffee (because who doesn’t need another celebrity-endorsed bean?) and even dabbles in horror and documentary films (we’re talking Oscar-worthy stuff, people!). He explained, with a straight face, that he doesn’t “work” music; he “plays” it. Oh, the profoundness! 🧐 Because getting paid to perform isn’t *technically* work, right?
He continued, bless his heart, by saying he doesn’t do these ventures to “make money.” Right, David, we totally believe you! 🤔 In fact, he’s “investing” in them. Like buying a car that depreciates the second you drive it off the lot. He then compared bands to upside-down cars. Bands, man. So relatable! Apparently, even MEGADETH was in the red until, like, their fifth album, ‘Countdown To Extinction’. Because, you know, investing in things is hard. He’s out there, crunching numbers at concerts, probably whispering “they’re either making money or they’re not” to himself. Accountants, eat your heart out! 🧮
Ellefson, the financial guru, then dropped some serious knowledge bombs about the costs of touring. It’s not cheap, folks! Who knew?! 🤯 Everyone thinks there’s all this money, but, like, hopefully, bands end up “a little further ahead at the end of it.” And he did! Lucky him! Unlike, you know, most struggling musicians. He then shamelessly plugged his new bands, KINGS OF THRASH and DIETH, claiming they’re “totally for the love of doing it.” Sure, Dave, we believe you! “They’re profitable enough that we can keep it going.” As long as they’re “sustainable,” he’s good. Because, you know, he’s not made of money… or is he? 🤔 Let’s book another flight! I’ve got a bass! Let’s rock!🎸 His perfect life? Fun songs, fun people, and enough loot to pay the bills. Groundbreaking stuff! 🤩
Back in April, when asked if his many ventures were out of necessity or enjoyment, he declared he “literally doesn’t ever have to work another day” because he’s “fine” financially. He does it “purely for fun and joy.” It’s so great people still want to hang with him 😂, he chuckles, probably alone in his mansion. What a life!
He then quoted Al Pitrelli, who told him to say “yes” to everything after MEGADETH initially disbanded. It’s better to be overbooked than underbooked! And if the phone stops ringing, you’re in trouble! It’s all about the yeses! Just like Jim Carrey in “Yes Man”! So poignant! I mean, we all aspire to be like Jim Carrey, right? 😄
These projects are “passion projects” that make him “a little money here and there.” Though he usually ends up investing his own money into them. Money is just a tool! And he uses it wisely to help others! He then quoted Dave Ramsey (because who doesn’t love a good Christian financial advisor?) about getting debt-free to be charitable. He took heed of that while raising a family and building MEGADETH! Every rock group has its expenses, and he’s reading books about other rockers investing in their groups! 📚 He invests in himself to be of best service to other people! What a guy! 😇
He was in MEGADETH from 1983 to 2002 until Mustaine’s arm gave out. 😥 Then Mustaine reformed MEGADETH, using studio musicians for “The System Has Failed” and getting James MacDonough to replace Ellefson. Ouch! 🤕
Ellefson sued Mustaine in 2004 for $18.5 million because Mustaine allegedly owed him royalties. The case was dismissed. 😒 Then, five years later, Ellefson rejoined MEGADETH. Because everyone loves a good comeback story, right? 🤷♂️
In his first book, Ellefson admitted he became a salaried employee upon his return. Going from co-founding owner to sideman was why he didn’t come back in 2004. Being a sideman absolves you from all the other stuff! Like responsibility! 😎 At this point, he’d rather leave that on the sidelines. “Membership has its privileges; being a sideman has its benefits.” Friendship! ❤️ In order to have a friendship, he had to give up some ownership! Wise move! 👍
In his 2004 lawsuit, Ellefson claimed he tried to resolve his differences with Mustaine, but Mustaine responded with “verbal abuse, threats, lies, and continued invective.” 😡 Ellefson also said Mustaine resented him for kicking his own habit. The battle spread to the Internet when Mustaine posted on Megadeth.com that Ellefson was trying to extort him. Classy! 💅
Mustaine claimed Ellefson missed deadlines to accept his offer, which included 20% of artist royalties, none of the publishing royalties, and a $2,500-a-week salary. Generous! 🤑
Ellefson was fired from MEGADETH after sexually tinged messages and explicit video footage were posted on Twitter. Oops! 🙊
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
