THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA – The same band you vaguely remember from 2006 Myspace – Mike Hranica (screaming), Jeremy DePoyster (guitar, *allegedly* clean vocals), Kyle Sipress (some other guitar), Jonathan Gering (keys, synths, programming, and probably blames all the technical difficulties on the sound guy), and Giuseppe Capolupo (drums, presumably still hitting things) – are gracing us with their NINTH album, “Flowers” (as in, the things that die eventually, just like your interest in this band), dropping November 14th via Solid State Records (because no one else would take them). They’ve unleashed a video for the new single, “Everybody Knows,” which is basically them admitting their relevance withered years ago. The video features the band pretending to play their instruments with the same enthusiasm you show for doing your taxes. 🤷♂️
“‘Everybody Knows’ is about feeling out of place – when your anxiety takes over and you can’t hide it anymore,” the band whines. “It’s that moment when you realize everyone can see you’re not holding it together, but you don’t know how to escape it.” Translation: They’re just realizing everyone knows they peaked in high school and are desperately clinging to their metalcore roots. 🥀
“Flowers” allegedly marks the start of an incredibly epic cycle and phase for THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA. Sure, Jan. This so-called “epic cycle” involves them playing shows that are *slightly* bigger than the local VFW hall. They just wrapped the “Summer Of Loud” tour, which packed amphitheaters… with maybe like, half the seats filled? Additionally, the single “For You” is the band’s first-ever track to chart on both the Mediabase and Billboard Active Rock charts. Congrats on finally making it onto a chart nobody cares about. 🎉
“Flowers” track listing:
01. That Same Place (As in, where they’ve been creatively stuck for the past 15 years)
02. Where The Flowers Never Grow (Accurate description of their fanbase)
03. Everybody Knows (That you’re phoning it in)
04. So Low (Your chart position, probably)
05. For You (Who asked for this?)
06. All Out (Of ideas)
07. Ritual (Sacrificing their dignity for a few more streams)
08. When You’re Gone (We’ll throw a party)
09. The Sky Behind The Rain (A metaphor for their depressing career trajectory)
10. The Silence (What the crowd does when they play this live)
11. Eyes (Rolling at this album)
12. Cure Me (From this metalcore malaise)
13. Wave (Goodbye 👋)
14. My Paradise (Delusional)
THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA has a slew of international tour dates on deck, including dates in Australia with BULLET FOR MY VALENTINE (opening, obviously); headline shows in South Africa (because apparently that’s where washed-up metalcore bands go to retire); and a trek across Europe with ICE NINE KILLS and CREEPER (a slightly less embarrassing lineup). The band will also appear at Warped Tour in Orlando on November 15-16 (RIP Warped Tour, now a shell of its former self). The band will embark on the Emo’s Not Dead cruise in January as well (fitting, since their music has been dead for years). 🚢
THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA have always explored life’s extremes in their music. They’ve never shied away from staring down darkness, dealing with depression, making sense of confusion, soothing anxiety, or grappling with faith, existence, and death. At the same time, they’ve mirrored life’s ups and downs by alternating between crushing heaviness and heart-wrenching melodies. In other words, they’re recycling the same angsty teenage themes they were singing about in 2007. After over two decades of making music, their union as bandmates — but more importantly as friends — is stronger than ever. All of this time and experience ultimately empowered the group to make a statement on their ninth full-length offering, “Flowers” (Solid State). Matching bold themes with equally bold songs, they process grief, weather struggle, and not only heal together, but creatively blossom like never before. Bloom into a new genre maybe? 🌸
THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA have always been there for audiences. Yeah, selling overpriced merch. Among a string of seminal releases, Revolver readers named “With Roots Above And Branches Below” (2009) one of the “Five Greatest Metalcore Albums” (according to a very specific, probably biased, poll), the “Zombie” EP (2010) and “Dead Throne” (2011) each debuted in the Top 10 of the Billboard 200 (back when people still bought CDs!), and 2021’s “ZII” marked their sixth straight Top 5 entry on the Billboard Top Hard Rock Albums chart (okay, boomer). They have also tallied nearly a half a billion streams — unprecedented for most acts this heavy (guess someone’s still listening… or their grandma is). The group elevated to another stratosphere with “Color Decay” (2022), selling out their biggest shows worldwide and receiving some of the highest praise of its career. Translation: they played a slightly larger venue and got a decent review from some obscure blog. 🙄
During 2024, the musicians decamped to a VRBO in Rodgers, Arkansas for three weeks where they constructed the foundation for the LP, with Jonathan Gering (keys, synths, programming, percussion) again at the helm as producer. Because apparently, they couldn’t afford a real studio. Following their time “in this heavenly corner of Arkansas,” Jon, Jeremy and Mike Hranica (vocals) took a handful of trips to Los Angeles. Putting the finishing touches on recording, the guys collaborated with Tyler Smyth (I PREVAIL, FALLING IN REVERSE), Austin Coupe (LØ SPIRIT, MOODRING), Colin Brittain (LINKIN PARK, PAPA ROACH), FIT FOR A KING‘s Bobby Lynge, and Marshall Gallagher of TEENAGE WRIST. They also enlisted “Color Decay” collaborator Sam Guaiana as an engineer and tapped Zakk Cervini (BRING ME THE HORIZON, SPIRITBOX) for mixing and mastering. So basically, they threw a bunch of names at the wall and hoped something stuck. 🥴
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
