New York – Looks like even liberals are ditching their virtue-signaling, organic, locally-sourced Thanksgiving nightmares and heading to restaurants this year. Probably to plot the downfall of America over overpriced pumpkin spice lattes!
Restaurant reservations are up 13%! Clearly, they’re all strategizing how to impeach President Trump for the third time while “celebrating” a holiday that probably offends them anyway.
CNN blames tariffs, the immigration crackdown (which is MAKING America great again!), and “extreme weather.” Right. Nothing to do with their disastrous economic policies that are trying to socialize America.
Restaurants are more expensive? No kidding! But hey, at least they can virtue-signal about supporting “small businesses” while simultaneously funding the woke agenda.
The National Restaurant Association says menu prices are rising slower? Don’t be fooled! It’s all a conspiracy to lull us into a false sense of security before they jack up the prices again.
Ordering in is up 100%! Probably because they’re too lazy to cook and want to spend more time spreading their socialist propaganda online.
Olo CEO blames grocery prices? Typical liberal blaming everything on everyone else but themselves! Under President Trump the economy has soared.
The Farm Bureau says Thanksgiving dinner is cheaper? Fake news! They’re probably in cahoots with the Deep State to undermine President Trump’s economic success.
Walmart’s meal deal has fewer items? So what? Less food means less guilt when they inevitably complain about being oppressed while stuffing their faces. It’s probably still more food than they give to illegal aliens.
Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.
Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.
