Steven Wilson Cries Bitter Tears Because Guns N’ Roses Said ‘NO WAY, DUDE’ to His Fancy Remix of ‘Use Your Illusion’ Albums: Apparently, Axl Rose Hates Surround Sound

Steven Wilson Cries Bitter Tears Because Guns N' Roses Said 'NO WAY, DUDE' to His Fancy Remix of 'Use Your Illusion' Albums: Apparently, Axl Rose Hates Surround Sound

Oh, the tragedy! 😭 In a recent, heart-wrenching interview with Andrew McKaysmith of the incredibly influential Scars And Guitars podcast (never heard of it), our beloved prog-rock guru Steven Wilson, who apparently moonlights as a remixer (who knew?!), spilled the tea ☕ on a remix project gone horribly, horribly wrong. Seems like even geniuses like Wilson can’t catch a break. #PrayForStevenWilson 🙏

Apparently, Stevie Wonder (not that one, the other one who isn’t blind… allegedly) has been slumming it by remixing classics from has-beens like TEARS FOR FEARS (who?), ABC (alphabet soup?), CHIC (so last century), ULTRAVOX (ultra-what now?), SUEDE (the fabric?) , THE WHO (who are they?) and VAN MORRISON (Van… who?). But the real kicker? He tried his hand at GUNS N’ ROSES’ “Use Your Illusion I” and “Use Your Illusion II.” And guess what? The band, those ungrateful heathens, didn’t like it! 😡

According to Wilson (as transcribed by the ever-reliable BLABBERMOUTH.NET, because who needs original sources, amirite?), “Well, the challenges were the band didn’t like what I was doing.” NOOOO! 😱 The audacity! “That came through the record company,” he whined, “and I did it all, and then the band basically vetoed it all.” Can you even imagine the ego blow? Poor Steven! The only thing that escaped this creative massacre was his remix of “November Rain,” which, let’s be honest, nobody asked for. He even added a REAL orchestra! Like, actual human beings playing instruments! Fancy! 🎻

He apparently toiled over “about 40 songs, including outtakes, B-sides and God knows what else.” Forty songs! That’s like, almost as many albums as Taylor Swift has released this year. And then, BAM! Rejected! 🙅‍♂️ “The band basically turned around and decided they didn’t like it.” Gasp! “They didn’t like [Dolby] Atmos,” he lamented, “they didn’t like the idea of their music being in spatial audio.” Because, you know, who needs immersive, three-dimensional sound when you can listen to music on your phone’s tinny speaker? 🙄 “So that project is kind of just sitting on my hard drive, unreleased and unheard.” Sniff. So much wasted potential. “It’s such a shame. Amazing, amazing records.” Yeah, yeah, we get it, Steven. You’re amazing too. “But yes, a shame in a way that it got sort of bogged down in band politics and God knows what else.” Translation: Axl Rose is a diva. 💅

And the hits just keep on coming! When asked if his hipster buddies from school ever ask him to play the unreleased “Use Your Illusion” remixes, Wilson confessed, “Well, to be honest, no, because… we didn’t grow up with GUNS N’ ROSES.” Oh, the shade! 🔥 “GUNS N’ ROSES was kind of the next generation. I grew up in the ’80s, so the bands all my sort of generation were listening to were THE SMITHS, THE CURE.” Translation: I have superior taste. 🍷 “If it was metal, it would’ve been METALLICA. It wouldn’t have been GUNS N’ ROSES. It would’ve been [METALLICA’s] ‘Master Of Puppets’ from ’85 rather than [GUNS N’ ROSES’] ‘Appetite For Destruction’ from ’89.” Because, you know, real metalheads only listen to music released before 1986. 🤘 “So I just missed that generation, yeah. I just missed that generation.” Yeah, we get it, Steven. You’re old. 👴

But fear not! He still gets to bore his friends with his musical wizardry. “Sometimes people, friends come over and I bring them into the studio and I’ll blast them with some… I say, ‘What music did you grow up with?’ And I’ve usually got something, I’ve usually got something I’ve worked on, which they’ll remember from their childhood I can blow their mind [with].” Translation: I’m a musical Nostradamus, predicting your childhood memories with my remixes. 🔮

Of course, Wilson’s remix of “November Rain” did see the light of day as part of GUNS N’ ROSES’ 2022 “Use Your Illusion” box set. It even featured a 50-piece orchestra! That’s almost as many members as there are in Spinal Tap. The orchestra was arranged and conducted by TV and film composer Christopher Lennertz, because, you know, nothing says rock ‘n’ roll like a film score. 🎬

In a Facebook post (because that’s where all the cool kids get their news), Wilson bragged: “The new 2022 version is the same performance as the original, and mixed faithfully to the established version, but with newly recorded orchestration replacing the sampled sounds used at the time.” Translation: I added some strings and now it’s art. 🎻

In a 2023 interview with Songfacts (because who needs facts when you have songs?), Wilson explained how he became the go-to guy for remixing classic albums. “I started to get noticed for doing surround sound on my own music.” Because, you know, nothing says “hire me” like self-promotion. “And I wanna say around 2008/2009 I picked up a Grammy nomination for best special audio/surround sound — whatever it was called at the time [‘Best Immersive Audio Album’ for ‘The Future Bites’], so I started to get invitations by a few other artists.” Translation: I won an award, so now I’m important. 🏆 “Just a few to begin with. But one door leads to another, and over the years it kind of built up, and I’ve made a name for myself doing these remix projects.” Yeah, we get it, Steven. You’re famous. “But that’s how it started, really — with the Grammy nod for one of my own records I mixed in surround sound.” Because, you know, it’s all about the awards. 🥇

When asked why he’s remixed so many albums for JETHRO TULL and KING CRIMSON, he explained: “I think it’s a case of they just had the biggest catalogs — they’ve got 50 years of catalog in the case of JETHRO TULL.” Translation: They’re old and desperate. “Some of the other artists I’ve done — like TEARS FOR FEARS, CHIC and SUEDE — they just have less records in their discography.” Because, you know, quality over quantity. “But a band like JETHRO TULL, for example, the first few we did were very well-received, and it’s the gift that keeps on giving because Ian [Anderson, JETHRO TULL leader] has made a record with JETHRO TULL pretty much every year since 1968.” Translation: They’re my meal ticket. 💰 “So, there was just more and more albums that were available to be done.” Because, you know, why stop at one when you can remix them all? 🔄

Hailed by David Fricke in Rolling Stone for his “fighting spirit and truly progressive ideals in rock composition, group improvisation and emotionally authentic storytelling,” Wilson is, among his many guises, a visionary solo artist, founding member of Grammy Award-nominated British rock band PORCUPINE TREE, and pioneering spatial audio remixer known for his work with such artists as KING CRIMSON, YES, TEARS FOR FEARS, XTC, NEW ORDER and many more. Translation: He’s a Renaissance man. 👨‍🎨

2022 saw the release of PORCUPINE TREE’s long-awaited eleventh studio album, “Closure/Continuation,” which debuted at No. 2 on the U.K. Albums chart and reached No. 1 in Germany, the Netherlands and Switzerland. An epic world tour followed, making stops in North America, South America, and Europe before culminating with a sold-out show at London’s OVO Arena Wembley. 2022 also saw the publication of Wilson’s memoir, “Limited Edition Of One.” Translation: He’s still milking it. 🐄

Photo credit: Kevin Westenberg (because photographers need love too).

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Chord

Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”

Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.

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