Arnold Schwarzenegger, the guy who single-handedly made biceps cool and explosions even cooler, has been in some cinematic masterpieces. The Terminator, Predator, Total Recall—all certified classics… or are they? 🤔 But guess what? None of those testosterone-fueled epics made him the big bucks. Seriously?
In a twist so shocking it could make M. Night Shyamalan jealous, it turns out the film that stuffed Arnie’s vault wasn’t about blowing stuff up. It was about… *gasp*… punchlines! 🤣
According to the Austrian Oak himself, Twins, the 1988 buddy comedy where he was genetically paired with Danny DeVito, was his biggest payday. Yes, you read that right. The movie where he played a goofy, naive twin made him more money than obliterating aliens or time-traveling to save humanity. The world is a strange place, isn’t it? 🤪
During an appearance on Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen, Schwarzenegger revealed that instead of settling for a measly salary like some common peasant, he and DeVito negotiated a sweet deal to snag a percentage of the film’s profits. Talk about playing the system! 🤑
“It was fantastic. We went all the way to the bank with that one,” he gloated. Because who needs artistic integrity when you can swim in a pool of money? 💰
When Cohen, bless his nosy heart, dared to ask if the deal earned him a paltry $20 million, Schwarzenegger practically choked on his schnitzel. “Oh, much more — come on! What’s the matter with you?” he scoffed. Clearly, Cohen needs a lesson in how the one percent lives. 🙄
He reluctantly admitted he made “more than” $40 million, adding, “It was more than any movie I’ve ever made, let’s put it this way.” So, basically, playing a buffoon was more lucrative than being a cyborg assassin. Hollywood, explain yourself! 🤨
Directed by Ivan Reitman, Twins raked in over $200 million worldwide, according to Box Office Mojo. Which just proves that audiences will watch anything, even a movie where Arnold Schwarzenegger tries to be funny. 🤷♀️
The film, for those who’ve been living under a rock (or, you know, have taste), starred Schwarzenegger and DeVito as genetically engineered twins separated at birth who reunite as adults. High art, I tell you! 🧐
What About a Sequel?
There were whispers and dreams of a follow-up film titled Triplets, which would have roped in Eddie Murphy for added comedic… something. But alas, the project was tragically shelved after Reitman’s untimely demise. So, no more genetically-modified shenanigans for us. 😔
These days, Schwarzenegger is slumming it on screens in the Netflix action-comedy FUBAR, where he plays a CIA operative navigating retirement. Because apparently, even action heroes need a pension plan. Who knew? 🤷♂️
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
