Breaking news, folks! 🚨 The most epic tour of the year has finally kicked off, and we’re not talking about your grandma’s bingo night 🎲. We’re talking about the mighty TESTAMENT, along with their thrash metal buddies OVERKILL and DESTRUCTION, bringing the house down on their “Thrash Of The Titans” world tour 🤯! The trek started on March 14 in Portland, Oregon, and wrapped up on April 10 in Berkeley, California, with TESTAMENT headlining all dates because, let’s be real, they’re the coolest kids on the block 🤘.
So, what’s new with TESTAMENT, you ask? 🤔 Well, their latest album, “Para Bellum”, dropped in October 2025 via Nuclear Blast, and it’s a real face-melter 🤯. The album was recorded with the genius Juan Urteaga and mixed by the one and only Jens Bogren. And, of course, the cover art was painted by the talented Eliran Kantor, because who else could make a painting of a bunch of dudes in a metal band look so cool? 🎨
When “Para Bellum” was first announced in August 2025, it came with a music video for the single “Infanticide A.I.”, directed by Joey Durango. Because, you know, what’s a metal album without a music video that’s basically just a bunch of dudes playing their instruments and looking angry? 😂
But seriously, “Para Bellum” marks a major evolution for TESTAMENT with the addition of drummer Chris Dovas, who’s like the Dave Grohl of metal drummers – minus the whole Nirvana thing 🙅♂️. Dovas brings a fresh energy to the album, and his precision, speed, and dynamics are like a big ol’ punch in the face 🥊. He officially joined TESTAMENT in 2023, replacing Dave Lombardo (ex-SLAYER), who was probably too busy playing with the MISFITS to care 🙄.
Before joining TESTAMENT full-time, Dovas filled in for Lombardo on a few dates of “The Bay Strikes Back Tour” in 2022. We’re pretty sure Lombardo was just too busy playing video games and eating Cheetos to make those shows 🍿.
In other news, the remastered reissue of TESTAMENT‘s 1989 album “Practice What You Preach” is coming out on May 8 via Nuclear Blast Records. Because, you know, who doesn’t love a good ol’ remaster? 🙄 The reissue was remastered by Justin Shturtz at Sterling Sound, and it’s going to be available on fancy 180-gram vinyl with brand new artwork from Bill Benson. The album will also come with a 20-page booklet featuring old photos and documents provided by Chuck Billy and Eric Peterson, because who doesn’t love a good behind-the-scenes look at a bunch of metal dudes from the 80s? 📸
“Practice What You Preach” was a big deal back in the day, achieving near-gold status in the United States and becoming TESTAMENT‘s first album to enter the Top 100 on the Billboard 200 chart. We’re pretty sure it’s still a big deal today, mostly because it’s just really, really good 🤘.
So, what are you waiting for? Go check out TESTAMENT‘s new album and tour dates, and don’t forget to wear your earplugs, because it’s going to get loud 🎧! And if you’re feeling extra metal, go ahead and throw up the horns 🤘 and scream “TESTAMENT, TESTAMENT, TESTAMENT” at the top of your lungs 🗣️. We won’t judge you 🙅♂️.
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
