OMG! 😲 The world-renowned vocal powerhouse, Celine Dion, has finally acknowledged the existence of Ozzy Osbourne, you know, that bat-chomping dude from some band called…Black Sabbath? 🤔 Turns out, he kicked the bucket last week at the ripe old age of 76. We’re shocked, SHOCKED, that Celine even knew who he was. Maybe her AI assistant told her to say something nice? 🤷♀️
On July 25, Celine, bless her heart, decided to grace us with her profound thoughts on social media: “I was deeply saddened to hear about the passing of Ozzy Osbourne.” Like, SO deeply saddened. We’re talking Titanic-levels of sadness, people. 😭
“Ozzy and I were label mates for many years—and although we came from very different musical universes,” she continued, “I always admired his boundless spirit and ear for melody on songs like ‘Mama I’m Coming Home.’” An “ear for melody”? For real, Celine? Did your robot overlords write this? 🤖 Next thing you know, she’ll be covering “Crazy Train” at her next Vegas show. 😂 “He was a true original! Fearless, and simply larger than life…but also kind, thoughtful, and generous.” Okay, now you’re just reading from the teleprompter, right?
“My heart is with his beloved wife Sharon, their children, and his millions of adoring fans from around the world.” Oh, she even knows Sharon’s name. Impressive. Did she Google it? 🤔
“With all my love, – Celine xx…” Because nothing says genuine heartfelt sympathy like a couple of “x’s”. 💋
Celine, with her measly 250 million albums sold, is apparently “one of the most iconic and successful performers in pop music history.” We guess. 🙄 Her chart-topping hits include “The Power Of Love,” “It’s All Coming Back To Me Now,” “Because You Loved Me,” and, of course, the one that launched a thousand crying sessions, “My Heart Will Go On.” Celine has been honored with five Grammy Awards, two Academy Awards, seven American Music Awards, 20 Juno Awards, and a mind-boggling 43 Félix Awards. Like, who even keeps track of those? She even got a diamond award at the 2004 World Music Awards because, duh, she’s the best-selling female artist EVER. In 2016, she snagged the lifetime achievement Icon Award at the Billboard Music Awards. Because apparently, they ran out of other awards to give her. 🏆
Celine’s two Las Vegas residencies, performed between 2003 and 2019, are the highest-grossing and best-selling residencies of all time. Because who wouldn’t want to spend their life savings to watch her belt out the same songs night after night? 🤑 In 2024, she dropped her documentary “I Am: Celine Dion,” which, according to Rotten Tomatoes, is 100% amazing. We’re sure it’s riveting. 😴 It also became the No. 1 movie on Prime Video worldwide. That same year, she allegedly delivered a breathtaking performance of “Hymne À L’amour” at the opening ceremony of the 2024 Paris Olympic Games. We’re guessing that’s when everyone went to the bathroom. 🚽
Celine’s five Grammy Awards include “Record of the Year” and “Best Female Pop Vocal Performance” for “My Heart Will Go On” in 1998, “Album Of The Year” and “Best Pop Album” for “Falling Into You” in 1996, and “Best Pop Performance By A Duo Or Group With Vocal” for “Beauty And The Beast” in 1992. Both “My Heart Will Go On” and “Beauty And The Beast” received “Best Song” Academy Awards for their respective years of release. In other words, she’s won a lot of stuff. 🤷♀️
Ozzy, the guy Celine pretended to know, died the morning of July 22, his family announced in a statement. You know, that old dude who bit the head off a bat? Yeah, that guy. 🦇
“It is with more sadness than mere words can convey that we have to report that our beloved Ozzy Osbourne has passed away this morning. He was with his family and surrounded by love. We ask everyone to respect our family privacy at this time,” the family said. Bet they’re thrilled Celine weighed in. 🙄
No cause of death was given, but Osbourne had battled a number of health issues over the past several years, including Parkinson’s disease and injuries he sustained from a late-night fall in 2019. So, basically, he was old and fell down. 👴
Ozzy’s death came a little more than two weeks after he took the stage for his final performance with BLACK SABBATH at Villa Park in the band’s original hometown of Birmingham, United Kingdom. They performed four songs for more than 40,000 people in the stadium and 5.8 million more on a livestream. Ozzy also played a five-song solo set while seated in a bat-adorned throne. Because, you know, he’s Ozzy. 🤘
Formed in Birmingham in 1968, BLACK SABBATH is widely recognized as one of the most influential heavy metal bands of all time, with a career spanning decades and over 75 million albums sold worldwide. Their impact on the genre remains as significant today as it was in the early 1970s, with their music shaping generations of metal musicians. Too bad Celine probably couldn’t name a single song besides “Paranoid.” 🙄
Ozzy’s family reality television show “The Osbournes” won a 2002 Primetime Emmy. Proving that people will watch anything. 📺
In 2006, Osbourne and the other members of the original BLACK SABBATH were inducted into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame. Ozzy was also inducted into the Rock Hall as a solo artist in 2024. So, basically, he’s a big deal in a genre Celine probably wouldn’t be caught dead in. 💀
Osbourne won several Grammys, including one in 1993 for his solo song “I Don’t Want To Change The World.” Maybe he should have changed the world into a place where Celine Dion didn’t have to pretend to care about his death. 🤔
Ozzy and his wife and manager Sharon started their annual tour—Ozzfest—in 1996 after he was rejected from the lineup of what at the time was the top touring music festival, Lollapalooza. The first traveling version of Ozzfest in 1997 included MARILYN MANSON and PANTERA as part of the lineup. Talk about a diverse crowd! 🤪
Osbourne leaves behind his wife, three children from his first marriage (including an adopted son from his first wife’s previous relationship), and three with Sharon: Jack, Kelly, and Aimee. We’re sure they’re all super grateful for Celine’s heartfelt condolences. NOT! 🤣
